Here I am, back in Australia. I had plans to write about the rest of my trip in Asia, but even the greatest of plans may not see an end. I will go as far as to say that I went to Bali for a night where I met my friend, the worm. But enough of him, for now my body is welcoming a new and more hideous illness, namely, chickenpox. My face resembling one giant blister, my job hunting plans have been put on hold in favour of activities involving far less human interaction. Am planning trips to some of Australia's forgotten wilderness in order to avoid the human eye for a couple of weeks - a beach house, my friend's farm & Australia's capital, Canberra (the latter being the most quiet and secluded of the three).
A brief rundown of events since returning to Sydney:
Was met at the airport by Colin & his sister, Claire. Drove to Claire's place for an emergency dose of vegemite on toast. Welcomed with presents and attacked by dogs at Colin's house. Welcomed by an unfathomably large pile of mail and shunned by my cat at my house. The next day was my welcome home party. Was fantastic to see my Aussie friends again, though a little overwhelming. Ate Aussie delicacies such as sausages and party pies and best of all, a giant chocholate mud cake, multiple pavlovas and an enormous tower of lamingtons covered in Australian flags (something I thought only the Danes did). At Tom's suggestion, I made everyone sing the Australian national anthem whilst I cut the cake. Between them all, they pretty much got all the words with minimal mistakes, so it wasn't too patriotically embarassing. Hilton was such a good sport about the whole Australia Day (now oficially renamed "Elena's Coming Home Day") affair, that he turned up adorned by a flannelette shirt, a realistic beer gut and an Australian flag T-shirt that he'd bargained with a Japanese salesman for. You can't get much more true blue Aussie than that.
Since the party, I've pretty much just been catching up with friends and cleaning my room. Have reformed since my days of junk hoarding - managed to throw out important items such as my childhood paper serviette collection, along with less important items such as my student bible.
And now, waiting, waiting, waiting.... waiting until I don't look like something that crawled out of a horror movie and can rejoin society.

And so, the first chapter of my life in Denmark has come to an end. Saying goodbye to friends and family was very sad, though to freezing temperatures and perpetual darkness less difficult. As the snow flew through the air outside, I sat in the departure lounge thinking nostalgically about my time in that cosy little northern country.
Danish classes and crazy guys who yelled, “Tomorrow never dies!” and told me that I must speak with all my teeth.
The ‘international club’ with our famous dinners, most often eaten at Peruvian, French or Italian time (thankfully, by the time I arrived in Denmark, Chino’s cooking skills had improved considerably since his first day in Denmark, upon which he attempted to make chicken soup by submerging a whole frozen chicken in a saucepan of boiling water & spicing it with salt).
Drinking too much cheap, cheap beer, on occasion followed by falling off my bike.
Painting Kamal’s apartment (hmm, is that where the entire 2 years went?)
Picking the dreaded cucumbers.
Cleaning the circus theatre alongside employees who consistently stimulated my intellect with questions such as, “Biology? - what the hell is that?”, “One of the actors complained about a dead cat smell wafting up from under the floorboards – can you go check it out?” and (drunkenly – at 9am or so) “Elena, why do you go ‘round in that sexy Madonna dress?” [shudder].
The extreme level of cleanliness and hygiene of Kitchen MP.
Missen raiding the kitchen after a heavy night of drinking and talking about the benefits of prostitutes with no teeth.
“The other Chino”.
Foxes, squirrels and deer (v. exciting!)
Struggling with pronunciation of the Danish ‘R’ (an ongoing battle).
Drinking beers at Nyhavn (ah – is there anything better?)

Will now steer away from all this reminiscence and return to the recounting of my journey. The first stop was Bangkok, where I was met by Kathy and Joerg. Fortunately, I arrived on a cool day – only 32 degrees (which was about 32 degrees higher than the temperature I was accustomed to). Even more so than the heat, I was particularly struck by the extreme noise level. After eating some delicious Thai food that night , I stumbled into bed (only to be struck with jetlag, insomnia, near heatstroke & disorientation a few hours later).
The next day we took a boat down the river. The boats are equipped with tarpaulins on the sides, so as to prevent any of the toxic water from splashing up onto the passengers. Kathy told me of a rock star who had to have multiple operations after crashing his car into the river and having various bacteria enter his brain. Upon hearing this, I was quite careful to open my mouth as little as possible during the ride.
Next we visited a wat (temple), the roof of which had a fantastic view over the city. From here, Joerg pointed out an area where a competition had taken place last century. The aim of this competition was to swing up to the tip of a tall pole and grab a bag of money with your teeth. “Hmm, that sounds rather dangerous”, I commented. “Oh yes, several people died”, came Joerg’s reply. Apparently, the first death gave no grounds for stopping the competition. Joerg derisively pointed out that death isn’t so scary when you’re going to be reborn anyway.
That afternoon was slightly unfortunate, with my wallet being stolen at the markets. I was most surprised to receive a call a few hours later from the lost and found office, advising that my cards, in fact, the entire contents of my wallet (bar the actual wallet & money), had been found. Cancelled credit cards proved to be a large and ongoing inconvenience, but luckily, my entire time in Asia is being spent with friends, so a large scale disaster was avoided.
After an overall enjoyable four nights in Bangkok, I said farewell to Kathy, Joerg and delicious Thai food (desserts with fried onions on top and all!) and flew to Jakarta, where I was met by Sarah and her husband, Andy. Have been living it up here in, as far as I’m concerned, a palace. Have eaten many a delicious meal and been enjoying the fine hospitality. Haven’t ventured out on any trains yet, and must admit am not particularly keen to do so after hearing that someone dies pretty much every day from accidents involving passengers sitting on the train rooves or similar. Andy assures me that Jakarta is incredibly overpopulated and traffic accidents are an effective method of population control, but I remain sceptical. Taxies are a safer method of transport, though crossing the road to get to them can be a bit dodgy – before Sarah got used to just walking out in front of oncoming traffic, her preferred method was to offer people money to help her across.
Strenuous tourist activities are currently on hold, due to my body’s difficulties in adjusting to the local fare. Will be heading home on 24/01. By the way, I was never here, though if you hear about it, it was fantastic & Sarah was very nice & everything was perfect and I am not writing this under duress.

Have just recovered from monstrous, day-long hangover following farewell party. Spent yesterday sprawled across the couch, stomach violently resisting any attemps at food consumption. Leaving Denmark in four days. Looking forward to being able to go outside wearing less than 10 kilos of clothing. Am in the process of trying to find a cheap flight from Bangkok to Jakarta, though am sceptical of sites offering cheap 'aertikets to Ingland'. Don't forget my party - 26th Jan. at Colin's place. See you all soon.